mEmoiRs oF a faShiOn poLicE ofFicer *part 1*

i wake up in the morning
& take that refreshing yawn

Brush my fine set of white teeth,
take a long shower

get dressed quickly,
but making sure everything goes
(its what i do for a living, who better to look out for these things?)

just before i step out,
i strap on my gadgets!

you're wondering what dey comprise of?
no real slUgs...just my objective sense of reasoning

& an eye for the crimes against fashion!

its burstling out there,
meant to be dangerous for me too

but unlike the real security forces,
i'm not conspicuously dressed!

ifeoma comes along,
one quick shot from me to her knee...*pow*
(those knees + legs, don't go with pedal pushers)

a slight graze to the shoulder,
the shades don't quite go but i could let her off on a lighter note....afterall she aint no pro

next in my line of sight is arabi,

'beach shorts & an office shoe, + a collar'd button down shirt.

*pOw* *pOw*
that's def 2 shots for ya!!
(sorry about the big toe, but i aint sorry about the knee)

i know, i knw
i shouldn't always be about violence
(dialogue is always known to work)

Walk up to Nnenna,
Asked her if she had a rough morn'n
(don't blame me, couldn't spell it right out)

skinniez & a high heeled pair of slipperz
(a no no!)

with a slim Tee.
i know normally that should go,
but you should have tried sneakers instead

a low waist jean & no ass,
what did you intend to expose??

Didi,
I'd give you a 2 ** commendation for them jeans,

the tank would have been anything but bad,
if it wasn't that perfectly slender body you got there

who'z the obnoxiously fat friend?

On sighting that really big belly
in a similar tank top,

i rush off to my car,
to get the gun wit the 2 bigGer nozzles

chk!!,.. chk! -.... poOWw!!
& there was a big hole right through the belly
(letn her go would have been signing up to live with that vision for the rest of my career)

no need returning the pump,
now i'm aware we have really daring offenderz roaming the streets!

you shouldn't be displaying yams in bum shortz,
the smaller nozzle dis time -->> *pOw*!

t-baba,
there'z a particular trend that goes with the waist coat & you aren't exactly living it!

sstzZ* sstzZ* 2 buzzes only

Adrian,
that's one folk who obviously got the memo.

A couple of shirts, teez & collar'd
nice jeans ...sneakers, plim solls*

not forgetn the good combo sense!

-->> that's 3 ***'z from me

Oge!
Who tagGed this classy chic with alansi jeans??

from my point of view naw,
i think its 'true religion' i see!

the maroon handbag & office shirt,
an obvious fit!

unlike vivian who i shot off a bike a couple of mins ago

you'd think it was independence day,
with too much of green & almost negligible white.

Owums,
you're still wanted for thOse granny pants oh!

i need to reload,
be back in a bit!

*o.tattler

Ck,
there's a difference between 'canz' like you call it & sneakers

yeah...sneakers are those you can wear with almost anything,
Airforce 1'z aren't the same thing

That's 2shotz,
i'm taking one leg off @ the knee (chk!! Chk!----poOWw!!)

EffizzY,
i'm most definitely spraying you!
(ra TA tA ta tA *chk!! Chk!----poOWw!!*//*chk!! Chk!----poOWw!!*)

you've been a very daring offender for a while now

We don't have bulky guys with boobs still forming gangster with bandanaz....Lol
(i'm not ready to spare a transgender)